Back to Lawrence
by RitaRebecca
Summary: After seven years on the road, John returns to Lawrence after learning of a fire. He finds something important.


Deep down Katie Winchester wasn't completely a Winchester. Her mother was. She had been John's sister, April. Katie had the barest memories of April. Her whole world was Dean and Sam and Dad.

John and April grew up together in Normal, Illinois and later moved to Lawrence, Kansas. They were close as kids, but drifted apart as they got older. John went to Vietnam and April protested. She struggled to find herself after John went to war. She waited tables mostly. She had a lot of boyfriends. It got so April didn't know who she was without a man in her life. Sometimes she followed them to other places, one guy took her all the way to Chicago, but she always ended up coming back. Things never seemed to work out. LIfe wasn't easy for her.

After losing Mary, John took the boys and set out on the road. He was determined to find the thing that killed her, stole his boys mother, the love of his life. Sammy and Dean grew up in motels and the backseat of the Impala. When Sammy was three and Dean was seven, they met Bobby Singer. He opened his door to them and saw the mess that they were. Sammy clung to Dean. Dean looked like he hadn't slept in a week. It was clear to Bobby that the kids had been through way too much. John was a wreck, obsessed. He wanted to find the yellow eyed bastard who killed his wife and he had been told that Bobby Singer was the man he needed to see. Bobby gave Sammy the first place he could ever call home, he gave Dean a chance to be a kid, and he brought John back to life. Long weeks of training and working and waiting rolled by and John was finally ready to pack the boys in the car and go. They would return to Bobby's again and again.

They were on the road for more than seven years. Dean had his twelfth birthday and Sammy would turn eight soon. John had been tracking yellow eyes and hunting monsters for years. He got close once, too close. The demon couldn't go after the boys, John had them too well protected, so he went after April.

They were on the road just north of Wichita, maybe two and a half hours from Lawrence. John always thought about visiting his sister when they came close, but he never did. He couldn't explain to April why he had disappeared without a word. He had to focus on the demon and protecting his boys. There wasn't room in his life for much else. April was the only family John had left and he figured that she was safer far away from him anyway.

Sammy was hanging over the front seat playing a game with Dean. John turned the stations on the radio to tune the game out and found the news. The farm report, weather, and a fire. A major fire in Lawrence, an apartment house near the corner of E 23rd Street and Barker Avenue.

"Sammy, sit back. Put your seatbelt on." John barked.

"Dad, we're playing." Sammy whined.

John glanced over his shoulder, "I said now! Do it!"

The Impala picked up speed. Dean tried to convince Sam that there was nothing to worry about while he shot worried looks at his father. John drove like hell. April lived in a run down apartment house on E 23rd and Barker. He sent letters once in a while. It was her place that was burning. Fire flared in his mind, the nursery, the house, Mary, all burning. He drove faster. Less than two hours passed before John stopped the car on E 23rd Street. There was a police line set up and the fire department was working to clear the house. The fire was long since wasn't much left.

"Dean, you stay with your brother. Stay in the car, don't move."

"Dad-"

"Please, Dean. I need to you take care of Sammy. I'll be back."

John made it to the police line. He saw faces he knew. He had a couple of friends in law enforcement, but it had been years since he had seen them. A short conversation got John across the line and he was led over to the ambulances. April was laid out in the street on a stretcher with a blanket covering her. He was too late to save her. Her face was covered in soot, her eyes were closed, and she just looked so young.

A Red Cross worker, a woman that he recognized but couldn't name, approached him. She was holding a chubby little girl with April's dark hair. Katie. She was two and she had lost everything. John swayed on his feet as he took her in his arms. Katie was crying, but not Sammy's terrified wail that came when his nightmares woke all three of them. This little girl wasn't scared, she was mad. She was trying to get to her mother and there were too many people in her way. John followed her eyes to April lying on the ground. He crushed Katie to his chest and moved toward the police line. Nothing good would come from seeing her mother like that. Nothing would bring April back.

Sammy and Dean appeared at the police line. John's stomach dropped as he advanced on his sons. If they had just stayed in the car...

"Dad-" Dean began.

"I told you. I told you to stay in the car with your brother. Damn it, Dean!" John said angrily.

"Dad, who's that?" Sammy asked in a scared voice.

John looked down at Katie. She was reaching back over his shoulders. He hadn't heard her, but she had been yelling, struggling the whole time she was in his arms. April was gone. April was gone and his heart was on the sidewalk beside her. It took a split second for him to thrust the wailing girl into Dean's arms.

"Take her. Keep her safe, Dean."

John turned to go and Dean said, "Dad, what's going on?"

John wiped a hand over his face smearing the tears and soot that Katie left behind. "This is Katie. She's, she's your Aunt April's little girl. She's your cousin. Hang onto her until I come back."

"Where's Aunt April?" Dean asked.

John looked from his son to the row of stretchers laid out on the pavement by the ambulances. He met Dean's eyes and Dean nodded. John went back, leaving the kids on the other side of the police line.

Dean turned his attention to Katie. It was a long time since Sammy had been that small, but he remembered it well. When he was little, Sammy cried hard and it took forever to stop. He looked down at Katie and she was clinging to him silently. Her head rested on his shoulder and her tears had stopped. The fight was gone. Sammy watched his brother and the little cousin he never knew about. He knew what Dad and Dean didn't say. Katie's mom, Aunt April, was on one of those stretchers and she was dead. Like Sammy's mom. He was used to being the one that Dean took care of all the time. He knew Dean kept him safe. A feeling surged in Sammy and he reached up to rub Katie's back. They needed to keep her safe and he would help. Dean smiled at him.

They waited for a long time. A policeman let them sit on a police car to wait for John. All of the responders knew Katie had been pulled from the building unhurt. They asked the boys a few questions and knew that she was safe with family. John found them sitting on the hood of the cruiser. Katie's head was resting on Dean's shoulder with her eyes wide open. Dean had his chin down, holding on like someone would try to take her away. Sammy was leaning against Dean, his head was touching Katie's and he was asleep.

John came up behind the kids and touched Dean's shoulder gently. Dean's head swiveled quickly and he saw his father. He was dirty,

"How is she, ace?"

"She's okay. She quieted down right away. I've been telling her about who we are. I told her that we would keep her safe now."

John swallowed hard.

"Son -"

"We have to take her with us. Katie's family. You always said that nothing's more important than family. We have to protect her."

John nodded. Dean was right. He knew that he had failed to protect April. He couldn't do the same thing to her daughter. He owed it to her to keep Katie safe and it was clear to him that she would stand a better chance if she was with them. April said that the father, she never would tell who it was, had been gone since before Katie was born. There wasn't anyone else. Having a two year old on the road wasn't an experience that John was anxious to repeat, but she was family. Dean convinced him. He loaded all three kids into the back of the Impala. Dean in the middle with Sam's head on his leg and Katie snuggled into his chest. John tossed a blanket over them. From the moment she was in the Impala she became their sister, John's daughter. She would never know anything else. No one ever made her feel like she wasn't wanted.

Five years and many visits under the bridge, John showed up again, haggard and broken, on Bobby Singer's doorstep. Katie was in Dean's arms. April's baby. John couldn't save his sister, but he would keep her daughter safe. Bobby opened his door and welcomed them in.

Sam and Dean were in love with her. She belonged to them, with them. Bobby thanked his lucky stars for Ellen Harvelle. She came and took John in hand and helped him start to figure out little girls. She would do it again and again over the years. They got through that first year mostly thanks to Dean and Ellen.

John was a mess. He lost Mary and it ruined him. He lost April and it broke him. It was hard and it took a long time to get better. John would lose himself hunting and rely on Bobby, Dean, even Sammy. It was hard to face Katie in the beginning . All he could see when he looked at Katie was April. That would never change; Katie was beautiful like her mom was. Katie wouldn't talk about the fire or her mother much as she grew up. All she remembered was a pair of yellow eyes in the darkness before the room started to burn.

John couldn't bring himself to tell Katie about April. He told himself that he would tell her when she was older, when she was able to understand. Except, as she got older, he couldn't face explaining what happened, so he threw himself back into hunting, trying to find the yellow eyed demon that took both Mary and April. He wasn't going to let the bastard take anyone else from him.


End file.
